breaking new ground

From this week I start the life of a part-time worker.
Three days a week from August through to the end of October. Yes,
it’s only for three months but that’s OK. I am looking forward to
the change in routine very much, and to where it may lead. The back
story started in May when voluntary redundancies were offered at
work. I put my hand up, but work said “No”. After two glorious
weeks of dreaming about how my life could be different, that was
disappointing news and I plunged into the Pit of Despair for a
while. Mostly because those two weeks clarified that This Life
isn’t the one that I want anymore. When I’d clawed my way out of
the Pit the question became, how do I make those dreams come alive?
They aren’t dependent on a redundancy package, so what steps do I
need to take? Working part-time is the first step. For such a long
time, work has been so central to my life. Now I am very happy for
it to take a back seat. This is a chance to discover how I can
define myself in another way. Who am I without work at the centre?
Who could I become? It’s also an opportunity for change – in me and
my life. To grow. To get off the treadmill and head in a new
direction. Am I burnt out? The signs would suggest that Yes, I am.
So this is also a time for Rest and for Play. A time to seek God’s
face and hear His heart. In broad, brush strokes I have a
reasonably clear picture of what I want. To spend more time with
friends and family, particularly Mum who has had a rough year. To
work somewhere that makes sense, and is fulfilling and meaningful
to me. Somewhere that I can serve and feel that I am making a
useful contribution. That potentially means leaving where I am now.
I’m ok with that. I started bible college this year – and am loving
it! – so I want to spend more time reading and reflecting, and
working out what the gospel and Jesus mean for my life. And Yes, I
still hope to be married one day, to build a life together with
someone, and to share life’s ups and downs, and everything in
between. I also want to Play and give more space and freedom to my
silly and creative side! You have been warned. So that’s the broad
outline. The weeks ahead will colour-in the details. I know that to
make this happen I will need to be intentional, prioritise, and
make some plans so that the extra Time isn’t frittered away. That’s
OK. I can do that! Each time I think, or talk, or write about this,
I can literally feel my heart and spirit expanding. This feels like
the right path. It feels authentic and honest. It feels good. It’s
exciting. Family, Friends, Service, Jesus, Love, and Fun. Simple
really.

2 Comments

  • gem says:

    Well even if they wouldn’t give you redundancy at least you can work part time. I am so happy that work doesn’t have to be so central for you now. I have a sense that will be nice. Hey if you feel like writing a next post say what you love about Bible College.

  • Mil says:

    Great news!! Look forward to hearing more about this.